You are in Lahore

The morning rush hour is from 6am to 12pm

The evening rush hour is from 2pm to 9pm. Saturday’s rush hour starts morning.

You buy anything and everything from Al-Fatah

Your 'maassee' and driver have taught you fluent Punjabi

Your uncivilized next door neighbor just bought a BMW because he deals in property

A really souped up Civic stops next to you and instead of a groovy exhaust sound, the woofers blare out an Abrar number

At least one of your friends is a Butt

The people in your local Gourmet Bakery know you by face

The only solution to boredom is eating out

All directions start with, ‘Go down to Main Boulevard’

You think it’s okay to wait 5 hours in the queue for Bashir’s Fish in Mozang because he only opens 6 months in the year

You go to Shahjamal every Thursday to smoke weed with Pappu Saaeen

Its quite all right to run a red light if the traffic policeman doesn’t have a bike to chase you

When someone asks you ‘’Bhai yeh Fortress kahaan hai?'’, you spread an evil grin on your face and send him to Johar Town

If you are hungry at 3 in the morning, you go to Coffee Tea & Co in your pajamas instead of walking to your kitchen

Your cousins from Karachi ask you about Food Street and you say, ‘I went there back in 2003′

Your winning argument about how Lahore is better than Karachi is ‘Lahore Lahore aey’

Your childhood dream of attaining higher education was to go to Aitchison or Kinnaird

You always thank the rude shop owner because he actually let you buy something from his shop

You know it’s inevitable that you’ll be challaned on Mall Road.

Your cousins from America ask you about malls and you’re like ‘Yeah we have Pace, but I never go there’

You go to the Daewoo stand more than the airport

(Thanks Maryum)

People from Lahore are invited to add more…